Ask the Foolish Oracle

Are you tired of the homogenized Internet where all websites look as if they come from one of a small handful of templates? This has nothing to do with that.

This is where you ask the questions.

The Foolish Oracle will answer them, maybe.

The Foolish Oracle has no credentials.

The Foolish Oracle

Need wacky wisdom to come right to your front door? The Foolish Oracle delivers! What he delivers is uncertain. It is safe to give the Foolish Oracle your home address but it is not safe to assume he will deliver to you something that makes sense. Wisdom comes in many forms. He will not deliver anything dangerous, unsanitary, illegal, or excessively frightening. Perhaps you will receive a box of nothing. Maybe a letter will be taped to your door. Maybe the Foolish Oracle will knock, run away, and hide. Sometimes the Foolish Oracle will leave your artifact of wisdom somewhere near your door but not right near your door. Maybe it will be in your yard somewhere. Sometimes the Foolish Oracle is afraid to fully cross certain thresholds.

The Foolish Oracle will deliver this wacky wisdom himself. These deliveries do not go through any postal service (see below if you’re into that kind of thing). Because the Foolish Oracle is bound by time and space, he can only deliver to a predefined area and that area is defined broadly as the Seattle area, but there is a map somewhere that’s a little more specific. Good luck finding it.

Because of the nature of these services, they cannot be provided for free. We are currently designing a pricing schematic. Stay tuned. 

Would you prefer to receive wacky wisdom in the mail? We can offer those services for a fee. It will not be as wacky as our hand-delivered wisdom, but it will still be wacky and/or wisdom (by our definitions, not yours).

For definitions please see below.

Questions For & Answers From the Foolish Oracle:

Q: Should I be worried?

A: Of course.

Q: Is it too late in the year to play outdoor sports?

A: Of course not!

Q: Should I quit my job?

A: If your job helps people without hurting other people, maybe not. If your job hurts people, even perhaps while helping other people, then you might quit. But I don’t know your exact situation. I’m an Oracle, not a Psychic.  Besides, sometimes we need to be hurt in just the right way. Do you provide that? If so, contact me.

Q: What book should I read?

A: My Host wrote a book so I should tell you to go out and buy it, but instead I’m going to tell you to read some Leonora Carrington.

Q: Should I buy the latest hot gizmo?

A: No.

Q: Why am I so unhappy?

A: Because you are trying to be happy.

Q: What is going to happen next?

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

The Foolish Oracle Lives Within the Host Body of Mammalian Research Vessel Bryan Edenfield.

Try Wordless Dictionary Creative Services for your creative needs.